Disappointing New Law

In a blow to the envelope marked "teeth" which I keep in my sock drawer, Pennsylvania recently passed some stupid law that they can't give you your teeth after they pull them out anymore. Dr. Graves told me that he has to send them to the OSHA office in Pennsylvania.

What do they do with them? They must have, like, a warehouse marked "teeth." Which to me is not fair. a) they already have all the bad teeth in Pennsylvania, and b) they're my teeth. I love getting my icky teeth when they're extracted. That's my reward for letting someone use a high speed saw on the bones in my head. When you're a kid, you get to pick something out of the prize box. As an adult, you get a little baggy of bloody teeth parts.



And what about my other teeth (pictured here being gross), which got pulled out in Chinatown where they hand 'em over no questions asked? It's an incomplete set!

This is a bummer that only prescription pain killers can take away.